sasha_feather: the back of furiosa's head (furiosa: back of head)
When I was a kid I had a long bus ride. A consequence of living in the country-- the school bus wound around the roads picking up the rural kids. I complained once to my mom that the trip was boring. She told me that if I looked carefully, I'd notice something new every day.

I live a quiet and careful life (to quote Anna Altman in Every Body Goes Haywire, and sometimes it's a boring and lonely life. But I notice something different every day. The change of the seasons and flowers blooming. New dogs at the park.

I had lunch today with [personal profile] jesse_the_k and we watched some animated short films. She wrote about it here.

my thoughts on one of the films )
sasha_feather: white woman in space suit (Astronaut)
A read a fanfic, Soulmate Theory for Dummies, by piffle, where Bucky is a plant hoarder like I am and has a cat.

There are a lot of plants, he admits silently, his eyes traveling over all the variously shaped leaves, just to make sure Stark didn’t touch anything. He still likes them, and doesn’t think he’ll ever give them up. They were the first living things he’d been able to lay his hands on after leaving HYDRA, the first things he hadn’t destroyed, and he’s grown fond of them since, adding to their number whenever he happens across one that he doesn’t already own.

He doesn't take anything toxic to cats. I think eventually he'll get a dog, so nothing toxic to pets generally.

I imagine he starts out with:
African Violet
Spider Plants (inspired by Black Widow; easy to grow) (Chlorophytum comosum)
Boston Fern
Burro's Tail (Sedum morganianum)
Friendship plant (Pilea involucrata)
Ghost Plant (Secum weinbergii) (because he's a ghost get it)
Wax plant (Hoya carnosa)

pictures )
sasha_feather: Black, white, and red image of woman with futuristic helmet (Sci Fi Woman)
To help myself fall asleep I told myself a story about two queer dragon riders and their dragons.

Dragon 1 is Iris and her rider is Avery. They do search and rescue and Iris got injured protecting Avery from a rock fall and lost her right wing.

Dragon 2 is Tailwind. Her rider is Geneva. They are an engineer pair who come to the hospital to consult on making a prosthetic wing for Iris.

I don't know if I have the energy to write this story but I'm enjoying thinking about it.

TV shows

Oct. 10th, 2016 10:18 pm
sasha_feather: Daredevil in a suit (Daredevil)
Inspired by kuwdora, here is some of what I'm watching lately:

A quiz-style comedy show with guests and internet prompts. There is the occasional offensive joke (based on joking about diabetes or something else tasteless); but overall it's well done if a bit on the rude side. Sometimes I laugh my butt off which is what I need. I watch this on Hulu.

I've watched the first three eps on Hulu, and I'm in love. Ginny Baker is the first woman to play in the major leagues. She's a pitcher for the San Diego Padres. All the characters are nuanced and each episode has a theme that is explored. The pilot focuses on Ginny's first games and her relationship with her father. The second ep focuses on Ginny being in the spotlight of celebrity, and her relationship with her agent. The third ep focuses on how she wants to be treated as a ballplayer first, and how she's had to fight for that.

Luke Cage
was AMAZING. So refreshing. I don't have a lot to say about it just yet.

This was cheesy and had bad writing at times, but there were some things I just loved. I loved the relationships between women, and how every episode passed the Bechdel test. Cat Grant is a terrific, hilarious character. Kara's earnest desire to do good, and her belief in other people's goodness, is wonderful to watch. The show improved over the course of season one.

Nurse Jackie
I got to mid-season 3 and stopped watching because it was giving me bad dreams. :/
sasha_feather: horses grazing on a hill with thunderheads (horses and lightning)

[Abbie, a black greyhound with a gray face, looking alert. She has a dusky pink bowtie around her neck.]
sasha_feather: Retro-style poster of skier on pluto.   (Default)
A simple coin toss
But it landed on the edge
An infinite space
sasha_feather: Cindi Mayweather (janelle monae) (Cindi Mayweather)
--She wears the MOST amazing outfits. Classy and fashionable and still comfortable looking.
--She is devoted to her work, but has changed careers twice, going from being a surgeon to a sober companion to a detective.
--She likes to sleep in. We often see Sherlock waking her up and she's clearly not a morning person.
--Brilliant in several ways, and calls Sherlock on his BS. I love watching their relationship evolve
--She's single for most of the time we see her. When struggling with whether to pursue a monogamous relationship and get more serious with her boyfriend, Sherlock advises her not to; that she is not made for that kind of relationships and that she's more interesting as she is. Both Joan and Sherlock are misfits. Their families and even their friends don't always understand them.
--She follows her instincts, and is sometimes wrong. She moves forward.

n.b. I haven't seen the more recent episdoes of Elementary because I'm ~~saving~~ them.
sasha_feather: Retro-style poster of skier on pluto.   (Default)
*I'm trying out lowering my topomax dose from 75 mg to 50.

*The weather is cooler thank goodness.

*I survived a large family gathering over Labor Day.

*I called Building inspection for city of Madison; a guy is coming tomorrow to look at the AC unit.

*Forgot to link it here-- I wrote a blog post at WordPress about working on anti-harassment for WisCon; in response to Jim Hine's io9 article. He RTed it so it got a fair number of hits!

*I'm reading a long DA:I fanfic called "Stuck in the Puzzle". I don't know this fandom at all, but the fic is really good so far.

*New photos of the dog:
sasha_feather: Amelie, white woman with dark hair, smiling cheerfully (Amelie)
Captain Phillips
This was even more racist than I expected. I mean I think the movie makers were *trying* to make a story about an "ordinary" guy who keeps a cool head in a tough situation. But what I saw was that there is a huge mobilization of the American military (a Navy ship, helicopters, SEALS, etc) to save this one white dude from people who are in a desperate struggle. I would have liked to see some more de-escalation techniques, more nuance when it came to the pirates and their reasoning, more contextualization of their lives. Instead we see wealthy white heroes and poor black antagonists... sigh.

I loved this to pieces. The story of 6 journalists from the Boston Globe who broke the story of the Catholic abuse scandal in 2001-2002. This film handles a tough subject in a sensitive and intelligent way. It's empowering in that it makes you believe in jouralism and the free press-- although the journalists struggle and encounter barriers, the first amendment is on their side and they are able to succeed. This film is chilling, subtle; highly recommended.
content note: detailed discussions of child sex abuse (not portrayed on screen)

Cradle will rock
Loved this ensemble film about the federal theater company in the 1930s. A playwright creates a musical about a union struggle in a steel town. Meanwhile Rockefeller hires Diego Rivera to paint a mural in his lobby. Congress investigates the theater company regarding concerns of communism. Orson Welles dreams up production designs. Super fun and inspiring.
Content note: brief scene of police violence against protestors
sasha_feather: Cindi Mayweather (janelle monae) (Cindi Mayweather)
Sometimes people think they have to choose between social model of disability and medical model: all one or all the other. I believe they work best in concert. Neither model explains the entirety of the experience of disease, illness, and impairment-- perhaps nothing ever will because these experiences are so complex and involve both individual and community experiences, and the many vagaries of our human bodies.

I think that all categorization and models break down with enough analysis... our human understanding of the universe is ultimately quite poor. We stumble in the dark. We stare at shadows on the wall of a cave.
But. We can try.

The social model works for me largely because medicine has failed; there seems to be little to nothing that medicine can do for my pain and fatigue. There are no medicines beyond caffiene that treat fatigue; and I've tried many many things for pain with little benefit. What helps me most are lifestyle interventions: resting a lot, essentially. Reducing my stress way, way down. Very gentle exercise. And when I read about the social model and disability activism I feel validated, comforted, more secure. I feel my world become wider. I feel a connection to others.

Trying to pursue medical interventions feels like exercise in failure. I do go to the doctor but mostly it's to make sure nothing worse is happening to me, rather than to try and get better.

I do think that most disabled people visit the doctor and believe in the medical model to an extent: we have to deal with doctors and providers to get needed medicines and therapies. We must believe in them as a matter of survival.

I'm trained as a scientist and I worked in medicine for a long time. I understand the limits and the benefits of this realm.

What I don't see enough of, is the medical field embracing-- or even knowing about-- the social model. It would be so interesting to see what could happen if practioners listened to disabled people and learned from our expertise.

When I worked in a hospital I noticed that universal design was (perhaps ironically) apparent there, because injured and ill people are normal in a hospital setting. So there is abundant signage. People are encouraged to use the elevators, and the elevators are big enough to fit wheelchairs and gurneys. There are places to sit and rest at the ends of corridors. Doctors offices, on the other hand, even my pain clinic (!) still seem comitted to using bright fluorescent lights. And of course the standards are different for staff versus patients, even though staff memebers certainly may be disabled as well.

--You don't have to choose between the medical and social model
--The medical world could stand to learn some things from the social model and from activists

uh huh

Aug. 24th, 2016 07:25 pm
sasha_feather: the back of furiosa's head (furiosa: back of head)
After my 2nd session of PT, I am still aggravated and thinking of quitting.

While she seemed a bit taken aback that I didn't like the reading, she did manage to roll with it. I said that it was too basic for me and that I have read better books about pain. I said that I did like the part about the body map.

She recommended I try an app in which the user practices Left/Right sorting of body parts; there is some evidence this supports correct functioning of the body map. I explained that I only have a PC, not a smart phone nor tablet. She didn't think this would be a problem.

So I look at the website for the app (which costs about 7 bucks for each body part featured)

And it says it's only available for Android and ioS. (Am I wrong about this? plz correct me if so!)



fuck PT.
sasha_feather: Retro-style poster of skier on pluto.   (Default)
I have PT homework that involves learning about some pain research.

Why Things Hurt - Lorimer Moseley (14 min Tedx Talk)
Understanding Pain in less than 5 minutes (whiteboard by PainAustraila)

Read section one of "Explain Pain" by David Butler and Lorimer Moseley (done)

What I struggle with here is a) the feeling of being talked down to, and b) Feeling like being told that pain is your fault. When in reality we don't actually know that much about it from a scientific perspective.
sasha_feather: Black, white, and red image of woman with futuristic helmet (Sci Fi Woman)
Stranger Things is an 8-episode show on Netflix. It's a fun horror show that takes place in 1983 and is reminiscent of movies such as E.T., the Goonies, and Gremlins.

In the first episode, we see a group of four boys, around age 12, playing D&D in a basement. On their way home, one of the boys, Will, takes a shortcut home and in a scary scene, is nabbed by a mysterious monster. The remaining three boys decide to help search for him in the woods and run into a girl with a buzzed hair who barely speaks. The show follows this crew of kids, the police chief, and some towns people and they investigate the disappearance of the missing boy and try to track down the monster.

Content notes: child endangerment; flashing lights; scenes of bullying

What I liked and didn't like, with spoilers )

Overall this is a clever, suspenseful, and well-done SF/horror show. Recommended.
sasha_feather: Black, white, and red image of woman with futuristic helmet (Sci Fi Woman)
Have headache, can't sleep.

Good things:

Going to the movies. I saw X Men Apocalypse at the cheap seats yesterday, and Star Trek Beyond today. Good way to escape the heat, and both were enjoyable films.

Pretty sunset tonight.

sasha_feather: Big book of Lesbian Horse stories book cover (lesbian horse stories)

Hunger Makes Me by Jess Zimmmerman.

Content note: discussion of disordered eating.

For a woman who has learned to make herself physically and emotionally small, to live literally and figuratively on scraps, admitting that you have an appetite is a source of cavernous fear. Women are often on a diet of the body, but we are always on a diet of the heart.

Comic (web and print)

O Human Star by Blue Dellaquanti

Robots, roboticists, queer and trans experience, relationships, wonderful art. I want the goddess print that is over Alistair's bed.
sasha_feather: Black, white, and red image of woman with futuristic helmet (Sci Fi Woman)
Spoilers for Ghostbusters ahead. Overall I loved this movie but there was some weird racist stuff going on.

Read more... )
sasha_feather: sirius black from harry potter films (sirius black)
A memory.

You know when they make you run in elementary school? Sometimes when I ran hard my bottom front teeth would hurt for a little while, in the same nervy way they do now. But now it's most all the time.

Good things:
Seeing Tempest today
Cooler weather
Working in the garden with my roommate
Reading a good comic book -- "O Human Star"
Seeing my dog park friends yesterday
sasha_feather: the back of furiosa's head (furiosa: back of head)
Feel free to add more in comments

--It's based on a true story
--It's more believable / realistic / serious / true to the narrative
--It has more artistic merit if it's tragic
--The actor was leaving the show
--It's a French story
"It's dangerous to tell the showrunner how to tell a story." --

--"Anyone can die in this show"

--"we didn't anticipate this sort of level of pain over this fictional death," --Jason Rothberg, the 100

--""It’s a really important thing to note that it wasn’t in any way an attempt to aggravate a social situation," Alycia Debnam-Carey, the 100

--"This was the ultimate compliment for her character to have a higher purpose. " --random commenter on Root (Person of Interest)


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