sasha_feather: Black, white, and red image of woman with futuristic helmet (Sci Fi Woman)
I saw Guardians of the Galaxy tonight with my roommate. This was a fun movie with a lot of great effects, action sequences, and good music.
Read more... )
sasha_feather: Max from Dark Angel (Max from Dark Angel)
I got most of my thinking on this topic from [personal profile] jesse_the_k; also some folks on twitter and at conventions.

A disability exercise is a training for abled folks, where a teacher or leader encourages people to take on the trappings of disability for a short time in order to learn about what it is like to be disabled. This might take the form of tooling around in a wheelchair, wearing a blindfold or ear muffs, or some other form of what is essentially "crip face": taking on part of the identity of a disabled person without experiencing the fullness of that identity.

I highly dislike such exercises and this post is about why. First off, I don't think that they are 100% bad or wrong, and I don't think it is always wrong to play with one's identity. I have written elsewhere about how I approve of abled people helping to make assistive technology cool, as does Ben Mattlin is his Op-Ed piece, When Wheelchairs are Cool. I think there is nuance and shades of experience everywhere.

But the main thrust of disability exercises-- to think that in a short space of time that one can teach a group of people about what it's like to be disabled-- is basically wrong.

* When you first becomes disabled, and/or first start using assistive tech, you are likely to be bad at it. There is a learning curve, just like learning to dance, swim, or ride a bike. It takes a while to become competent at adjusting to your body's differences and the tech you are using. But eventually you do become competent at life. Doing a disability exercise for an hour, day, or even a few days gives you only the experience of incompetence, and likely will lead you to believe that disabled people live very hard lives-- the lives of doggie-paddle swimmers instead of practiced butterfly-swimmers.

* Many disabled folks live in a community. We have the support of friends, family, and a disabled community of our choosing. I have a chosen internet community and political identity that I value very much. I doubt that such disability exercises present or explore these identities and networks. Separated from them, again my life would be much harder than it is.

* The social justice model of disability can be shown in other ways. If disability is created in the environment, this can easily be created in an exercise to make abled people disabled. Have them, in order to get onto a stage, be required to climb up a knotted rope, for instance. As one friend said on Twitter: in order to simulate my disability, wait endlessly in a doctor's office and then be scolded for taking pain meds. This is a way of expanding our ideas about disability and accessibility: requiring to fill out complex and endless paperwork for Medicare is way of disabling people. It's a more political thought than putting a blindfold on someone and having them stumble around a room.

* Some of the supposedly abled people in any group may be disabled and not know it, or may not identify as such. Learning about the social model of disability will likely help them. The social model helps me frequently identify barriers in the environment and think about ways to lower or deconstruct such barriers (not "overcome" them, a term that focuses on personal triumph rather than community or political will).

* I do think that exploring stigma is valuable. For instance, even using a cane, for me, will get me questions from strangers and acquaintances as my disability moves from invisible to visible. People will open doors for me and treat me differently. Walking with a friend in a wheelchair (when I'm not using a cane) means that people think I am a personal carer. Observations like these are valuable.

* However, simply listening and believing disabled folks when they speak and write about their experiences is sufficient. One does not have to do a "disability exercise" which is essentially disability tourism, and can be exotifying. The same is true for listening to stories and experiences that are different than your own in any way.
sasha_feather: neat looking overcoat (coat)
Quoting [profile] firecatstef:

This "spoon shortages explained" poster is good, but I'd prefer a poster that also mentions that any of these activities could randomly develop a spoon leak.
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=657536917659006&set=a.471348919611141.1073741826.345920125487355&type=1&fref=nf [image is below if you don't want to click]
In fact, I am going to generally ponder thinking about disability-related energy shortfalls in terms of liquid rather than discrete entities like spoons. Some liquids evaporate/freeze/boil/expand/contract at different rates depending on conditions. Some liquids interact with their containers. It's easy to spill liquids of the containers aren't handled properly. And so on.


I also liked this image "Understanding Invisible Illness", which shows an iceberg, things above the surface and those below. Taken from FB's "Chronic Illness Cat" page.

image )
sasha_feather: neat looking overcoat (coat)
This has been one of the more stressful few weeks of my life.

I am pretty sick. All-over achy and tired. I took two days off of work (yesterday and today) but not sure how much it helped. I'm afraid that I am under-performing at work at that shit is gonna hit the fan. Well, it won't be the first time that has happened I suppose. Being chronically ill and trying to work and survive on your own is something that there is not a lot of room or support for in society. Right now I am really longing for a different way to live.

This week on the WisCon ConCom list I got really angry, fought with people I respect, and well, made myself sick I guess.

Possibly I am not eating enough protein.

Thank you to everyone who has been supporting me in various ways. Thanks also to everyone who writes about things like:
Tone argument
Gas lighting
Microaggressions
Man-splaining
Concern Trolling
Derailment
White woman's tears
Boundaries
Victim blaming
etc
...
because I've been listening and learning.
sasha_feather: Max from Dark Angel (Max from Dark Angel)
I went to an event today at a park called Disability Pride. I'm friends with one of the organizers but have a weird avoidance relationship right now with another of them. They have a performance stage with loud music, food and booths, and people mill around and chit chat.

I am very tired and was not quite firing on all cylinders. I sat and talked with [personal profile] jesse_the_k and a few others. One woman I met, Kathleen, used to go to WisCon and it turns out she started childcare there. We asked her when this was, and she wasn't sure, maybe the late 80s. She doesn't have kids, but her friends in the dealers' room did, and they were having an issue trying to make money there and find child care. The concom was comprised of people who did not have kids and it apparently hadn't occurred to them to provide child care. Now, 25-ish years later, child-care is an inherent part of the con. (I tried to take a break from WisCon today, but this was a nice thing to talk about, actually).

I got a free massage and tried some yoga (painful). Later I walked the dog briefly and took a nap. I'm having a lot of pain and fatigue.

SDS 2014

Jun. 15th, 2014 07:32 pm
sasha_feather: Retro-style poster of skier on pluto.   (Default)
I attended the Society for Disability Studies conference with my friends [personal profile] jesse_the_k and Barb, which was in Minneapolis over 4 days. My impressions were that it was highly academic, rather expensive, and quite thought-provoking. I experimented with live tweeting some sessions under their hash tag: #Sodist2014.

My impressions on accessibility at this conference:
--Nearly every panel was live-captioned via CART.
--There were many interpreters.
--Mics were in every room and were used by everyone.
--Presenters were pretty good about spelling difficult words for the captionists, elegantly describing images, and checking to make sure they were heard.
--@PriceMargaret was especially good about checking in for access: when presenting, she would say such things as: "Please do what you need to do for your own comfort in this room; such as moving chairs around, getting up to stretch, zoning out, or whatever. Also feel free to interrupt me for access needs."
--At opening ceremonies, all the aisles (both directions) were wide enough for wheelchairs to pass.
--Water bowls were available for service dogs.
--Scent-free soap was provided to registrants.
--It was great being in a place where disability is normalized.

Negative things:
--As Jesse noted, wheelchair seating could have been better. There were no designated seats in front for those who needed the captions; and no marked out boxes for wheelchairs. At the luncheon, no chairs were removed from tables for wheelchairs, and the tables were set pretty close to each other. This seemed odd. There were no marked lanes for crowd control.
--Signage was bad. It was difficult to find the bathrooms, elevators, and program rooms. There was a map in the program book, but it was buried on page 17.
--The program book was difficult for me to use/navigate.
--Many of the presentations were in an incredibly high academic register and were incomprehensible. I tried to avoid these and go to more understandable ones.
--Interesting meetings were scheduled over meal times, which is fine, except that it was difficult to find fast, cheap food. So I did not attend these meetings. Not much food was provided by the conference. We thought that probably the money for food went towards CART and interpreters instead. I am happy to pay for my own food; what I suggest is that the conference work with the hotel to provide box lunches for a fee, so that people can attend these meetings without having to use spoons to hunt down a meal.
--The hotel, hotel restaurant, and many nearby restaurants were quite pricey. I keenly missed the free food and booze that is offered at WisCon, and the nearby Noodles and other less expensive eateries. Economic accessibility matters too.

I had a really great time and learned a lot! I left my dog with a dog park friend and now she is back on the sofa with me.

My favorite presentations:
Disability in 5 objects
Disability and Shoes

:D
sasha_feather: neat looking overcoat (coat)
Painful cough all day, chest congestion, sore back.

Spoke out loud very little today. Not good for me to not talk like this so I'm going to try and update my journal a little more frequently.

I watched all of "Legit" on Netflix streaming this weekend (13 half hour eps). I liked the disability content; it will give me something to talk about on my WisCon panel re disability and TV. One of the three main characters is a Billy, a guy who has MD, is a wheelchair user, and needs a lot of assistance. In the beginning of the show he's in a nursing home, but comes to live with his brother Steve and their good friend Jim. These guys are all kind of irresponsible 30-somethings who like to have a good time; they drink, use drugs, and Jim sleeps around. They show really lets Billy have a social and sex life, explores themes of autonomy, mortality, and even possible parenthood for Billy. He has friends from his old nursing home, including a recurring character named Rodney, a guy with a developmental disability. In one episode Billy tries internet dating.

The humor on "Legit" is sometimes offensive and won't be for everyone. Jim Jefferies categorizes himself as an offensive, trashy comic and sometimes goes for that joke with the shock value and seeks to make people uncomfortable. (One episode, "Misunderstanding", deals with the fall out of a rape joke gone wrong.) But his show has real heart, and real representation for disabled people. In episode 10, tons of disabled actors are featured when Jim attempts to volunteer at Billy's old nursing home for a day of games. An episode deals with Billy and Steve's mom, who is a hoarder, as the guys confront her and try to get her to clean out her house. This episode didn't seem funny to me, but it did seem real, painful, and it seemed like all the characters were dealing with the crap in their lives in ways that mattered.

I really enjoyed this show. Don't know if they will get a second season but I hope so!
sasha_feather: Black, white, and red image of woman with futuristic helmet (Sci Fi Woman)
Occasionally I wonder if maybe I *am* the language police! Maybe I *am* too sensitive and it's not my job to tell other people how to talk or write, etc.

A few things reassure me.

One, lots of other people pay just as close attention to language and its political uses as I do, and some of these people blog about it. Some people blog about things I've never thought about, so maybe the things I notice are worth writing about.

For example:
Dave Hingsburger: Non-traditional doesn't mean unimportant.

The term I use, I insist that others use when they are speaking with me about someone they support is: non-traditional communicator. (As opposed to "non-verbal".)

Lydia Brown: Why the term 'psychopath' is racist and ableist. (Note: this post contains some upsetting language.)

Antisocial Personality Disorder, the diagnostic category that comes closest to approximating the lay definition of psychopathy, is most often a tool for criminalizing poverty, blackness and brownness, and disability. It is the diagnostic label that legitimizes non-compliance as a mental health problem.

---

Two, I find language and its uses fascinating. I will think about it anyway, so I might as well write about it.

Three, there are some phrases I use that make sense to me because not only do they seem like more accurate metaphors, they make the world a little kinder to live in.

For instance, when we speak of "lowering barriers" or obstacles, that seems kinder and easier than "overcoming obstacles". Lowering barriers is a group effort, a structural accomplishment that is done by many and benefits many. It agrees with the idea of the social model of disability. Overcoming obstacles might take teamwork, but it tends to focus on one person's drive, ambition, and success, and falls in line with the "supercrip" stereotype.

The same is true of interdependence vs. independence.

Language is subtle and it influences the way we think about ourselves and our world.
sasha_feather: Black, white, and red image of woman with futuristic helmet (Sci Fi Woman)
What Disability-related Programming would you like to see at WisCon this year?

I am happy to submit program ideas if you all can help me come up with some!

Some thoughts to get you started:

Interdependency and work sharing

Hierarchies within communities and how we disrupt them-- (ie, am I disabled or queer enough?), getting rid of the gates!

Political coalitions. Groups of disabled folks are naturally coalitions since our disabilities differ.
sasha_feather: Retro-style poster of skier on pluto.   (Default)
Today I read an obituary which said, despite the person's chronic disease, "he rarely missed a day of work."

As someone who has often called in sick, I'm always bothered by this common phrase; it praises people who put work before health. Not just their own health, but the health of others: coming to work while having a communicable illness puts others at risk too.

This phrase serves to enforce our place in a capitalist, production-oriented society, where work is the most important thing, and health and rest are distant followers. Workers are granted sick days, but to take them is some sort of indulgence rather than a necessary part of being a human being with a body. We also forget that sick days are something that unions have fought for.

Because I'm always sick to some degree, I often struggle with deciding whether I am sick "enough" to call in, sick "enough" to stay home and rest. Typically I will feel guilty if I call in sick, even though my body demands rest. Having a chronic illness means that I need much more rest than the average person, and something like a migraine or cold will add to my need for rest. Language valorizing people who don't call in, ever, doesn't help to alleviate my guilt.

As I saw someone say on twitter: self care is a radical political act.
sasha_feather: cartoon charachter who has Syndrome (i have syndrome)
Source: purpleviolin91 on Tumblr
link to image

100: Fully recovered. Normal activity levels with no symptoms.
90: Normal activity levels with mild symptoms at times.
80: Near normal activity with some symptoms.
70: Able to work full time but with difficult. Mostly mild symptoms.
60: Able to do about 6-7 hours of work a day. Mostly mild to moderate symptoms.
50: Able to do about 4-5 hours a day of work or similar activity at home. Daily rests required. Moderate symptoms on average.
40: Able to leave house every day. Moderate symptoms on average. Able to do about 3-4 hours a day of work or activity like housework, shopping, using computer.
30: Able to leave house several times a week. Moderate to severe symptoms much of the time.
20: Able to leave house once or twice a week. Moderate to severe symptoms. Able to concentrate for 1 hour or less each day. Able to do about 2 hours of work at home, or activity like housework, shopping, using computer.
10: Mostly bedridden. Severe symptoms.
0: Bedridden constantly. Unable to care for self.


Notes from Tumblr:
dogunderwater:

fantasticallyfibro:

mynameiskleio:

rainbowrosepetals:

purpleviolin91:

the best pain scale ive ever seen for chronic pain #Repost from @jennjenn129 with @repostapp #chronicpain #rsd #crps
Helpful activity scale both for talking to practitioners and gauging your own progress.
I’m 30!!!!
Fuck. I thought I was doing better but yeah I’m at a 40. I I’m out much longer I get a migraine or otherwise ill most times :/
This is like… too real. How am I supposed to bullshit myself now??

(end notes)

The note about being no longer able to bullshit oneself is particularly apt. I run about a 40 or 50 on this scale.

Respiration

Aug. 3rd, 2013 03:08 pm
sasha_feather: cartoon charachter who has Syndrome (i have syndrome)
I had an asthma dream: I was visiting nicely with a couple of fandom friends on some sort of joint trip somewhere. But then I decided to go for a walk. I walked too far, and had to hurry back to catch a train. I had to walk up hill, in the heat, carrying a very heavy back pack full of text books. I stopped for cold water and tried to use Euro bills in a vending machine. Everything was very much a physical struggle.

With chronic illness there is a lot of "Why?" that goes unanswered. Going to doctors, getting tests, trying treatments, is in some ways an attempt to answer that question, "Why am I ill? Did I eat something I'm allergic to? Is it air pollution? Is it that cigarette smoke from the other night? Is it pollen?" Occasionally some answers may present themselves, but some answers never will: "Why me?" for example. Or, why does illness and suffering exist at all?

One of my favorite Jesse the K quotes is "pain has no meaning". It does not represent past life guilt, it is not meant to build character, and searching for one's pain triggers only benefits a person up to a point. After that, there are diminishing returns: you obsess over your pain and get no new information.

So, having chronic illness involves a lot of acceptance work. And it is work, of an emotional sort. I find that I must work on accepting, over and over, that I am ill and that I must rest.

Some motherly types on Facebook encouraged me to go to urgent care after I posted seeking asthma advice. I went this morning, got nebulized, and got an increase in my prednisone prescription.
sasha_feather: white woman in space suit (Astronaut)
1. Sometime in June I decided to put plastic sheeting and duct tape over the open car window of my neighbor's car. It rained a lot in June, and it bothered me every time I parked my car, seeing this nice car with its window down, the owners nowhere to be seen, and rain coming in. I also put some plastic lids with baking soda on them inside the car to try and reduce the smell.

Today my neighbors returned from their long vacation in Europe. They thanked me warmly for taking care of their car, saying they don't know what happened with the window. They gave me a box of Belgian chocolates. The man had talked with me before about Minnesota-- I am from MN, and he'd lived in the Twin Cities while getting his degree. So when I said, "No problem, it seemed like the neighborly thing to do," he said, "Maybe the Minnesotan thing to do."

2. I went to a Disability Pride Madison festival. It was cold, but fun. I met a few folks.

3. I gave away some spider plants by setting them on the curb.
sasha_feather: Simon Pegg from Hot Fuzz holding a gun looking tough (hot fuzz)
I hope you all know by now that language and its effects are an issue near and dear to my heart. Language can be hostile or welcoming, centering or othering. This is particularly on my mind as I look at various "accessibility" policies for conventions in the SF/F world.

I am creating List of such conventions for the Geek Feminism Wiki. (This was inspired by their List of cons with anti-harassment policies.)

First, why is it helpful to have such policies online?

Because information is good access. The more information you can provide to people, even if it's to say that there are barriers to access, the better people can plan for their trip.
Secondly, if people have to ask to receive information, that in itself is a barrier. As many of us with anxiety, fatigue, or other disabilities know, it can be difficult to make that phone call or send that email. A lot of us are used to dealing with people on the other end of the line who aren't our allies and might make our lives more difficult when we ask for information.

As and someone working access, do you really want to give out the information again and again? Why not just do it once, and then point people at your webpage or printed materials?

I know there are some conventions that have had good access but don't have their policies online. Open Source Bridge, I'm looking at you. :)

Other conventions have their policies online (good!) but then make all kinds of mistakes with language. They send signals that they really don't want PWDs to attend at all, that they think people are faking disabilities in order to get good seats or other services (no one does this! seriously), and otherwise hostile language.

Several of these pages use the term "special needs". I don't think very many people on this planet have special needs. Most people have the same needs, it's just that some of us need accommodation in order to enjoy the same events at conventions, like getting to the programming rooms in a timely manner, being able to move through the hotel, being able to understand what is going on, being able to visit with friends, etc. I realize special needs is an introduced PC term for disabled people, but I am just not sure that it fits or is accurate. It makes it sound like disabled people want "more" (like champagne) when what we really want is the same stuff as everyone else (water in a glass we can hold).

Whenever you want to say or write "special needs", I suggest you substitute "accommodations" instead.

Let's Break down some of the specific policies and why they are problematic:

DragonCon

"We will have the Con schedule in large print available (to be read at our table or we can email a copy to you to print or download to your screen reading device)

If you have low vision, you better have a device for reading the program. Otherwise, you have to sit at the registration table to read the program! It's apparently too hard for them to print off a few more copies for low-vision attendees. (Remember, this is a for-profit con.) I really don't know why you would want people clustered around your reg desk that way.



We offer 5 stickers for badges, based on needs:

Wheelchair seating: for our wheeled folk, of course.
Chair in Line/End of Row: for non-wheeled folks with mobility impairments.
Proximity/ 50 ft. to Screen: for visual/lip reading access.
Sightlines: for access to the interpreter, safe space for working animals, and certain other unique situations.
Medical: This sticker is merely a place to put emergency information if you have a medical condition that the EMT needs to know about before they put you in the ambulance. It does not entitle you to any other services.


A person has to out themselves in order to get any of these services. It's right there on one's badge: everyone you interact with at the convention then knows you are a disabled person. It also positions whoever gives the sticker as an authority. I know a lot of people with mild hearing loss who don't consider themselves disabled, but who might benefit from line-of-sight seating. Such people wouldn't want to get a sticker even if they might use an otherwise reserved chair.


One important thing to remember: we will do our best to make sure events are accessible to you, but that does not mean we guarantee you a front row seat, or head-of-the-line privileges. If you are going to a very popular event, you must get there extra early to get a good seat, just like everyone else. The accessible seating will not be in the front row.


I guess if you move slowly, are delayed by crowded elevators, etc., you are screwed. Several other websites said this. Maybe these conventions should put a cap on their membership? (Oh wait, DragonCon is for profit.)

Phoenix Comic Con This is the worst one.

You get a special badge! Lucky you.

But the badge doesn't get you:

· Early access to panels and special events
· Guaranteed access into special events, photo ops, autographs, or panels.
· The ability to skip lines

So fuck you I guess! Especially if you are someone who can't stand for a long time!

Service Animals are always welcome at the Phoenix Convention Center. Animals are sometimes questioned if the need is not apparent, so we suggest attendees carry documentation with them for their companion.

Does anyone know if this is actually illegal? It sounds illegal to me. [eta: it is, see comments] Then again, it's Arizona... I don't think "welcome" means what they think it means, also, to be pedantic, you won't get very far questioning an animal!

Some of the other policies are much better, including for ReaderCon, FogCon, and Arisia (and WisCon, but no need to toot my own horn--plus, I always want to improve.) Some suggested bits of activism for those involved with conventions, or even those who aren't but who can do emailing:
*Encourage Conferences and Conventions to develop Access policies and list them online. Professional and Academic conferences, trade shows, etc can be included here.
*Encourage those with bad policies to improve them.

Comments and suggestions welcome.
sasha_feather: Retro-style poster of skier on pluto.   (Default)
A couple notes I wanted to make while reading Far From the Tree.

p. 17: "Much of the debate around sexual-orientation laws has turned on the idea of that if you choose homosexuality, it should not be protected, but you are born with it, perhaps it should. Members of minority religions are protected not because they are born that way and can't do anything about it, but because we affirm their right to discover, declare, and inhabit the faith with which they identify. [...] This cripple-like model of homosexuality is depressing, but as soon as ayone posits that homosexuality is chosen or mutable, lawmakers and religious leaders try to cure and disenfranchise the gay people in their purview..."

I have blogged about this before here, so it was nice to see him cover it. It's particularly nice to see the way he frames it: the defensive position is held only because of attacks by lawmakers and the religious right.

p. 5: "We often use illness to disparage a way of being, and identity to validate that same way of being. This is a false dichotomy." [Here he talks about the wave-particle dual nature of light.] "A similar duality obtains in this matter of self. Many conditions are both illness and identity, but we can see one only when we obscure the other. Identity politics refutes the idea of illness, while medicine shortchanges identity. Both are diminished by this narrowness."

It is important to remember that models are incomplete ways of describing the world. Models are developed because we are unable to fully understand the world; it is simply too complex.

Models are sometimes in opposition with each other but not always: Most disabled people use medicines and support certain charities but also rely on the social model of disability to help us understand our place in the world and world for a better standard of life.
sasha_feather: Leela from the 5th element (multipass)
[personal profile] futuransky: Radical queer agenda panel notes/transcript

Me in access-fandom: Masked vs. Blind

---

I have been watching "Call the Midwife", which is a really lovely show. S1 is on Netflix; Season 2 is streaming on pbs.org. However: episode 2x04 is a Very Special Disability episode, about a baby born with spina bifida. I did try to keep an open mind here, but this ep need content notices for: Discussion of euthanasia of disabled babies, forced institutionalization of disabled babies and children, and lots of processing of abled people concerned PWD, including how difficult their lives will be, etc. There is also a character with anxiety, although I liked and related to her arc. The episode does actually end OK.
sasha_feather: Amelie, white woman with dark hair, smiling cheerfully (Amelie)
I really liked this post by s.e. smith: In Defence of the Urban Car.

I am good at guilting myself about things. The "shoulds" can take the voice of a parent, or the voice of liberal politics, or just a general sense that I should be doing more things during the day. As a person with lots of pain and fatigue, I generally need to rest a lot and I often have low productivity. It also helps me to drive my car rather than walk or ride the bus. The bus makes me feel motion sick and sometimes anxious. Walking leaves me tired out.

Last spring and summer I would walk to the neighborhood dog park (about 4 blocks) quite regularly. Then in mid-summer my knee swelled up. I started driving to the neighboring town's dog park, about 4 miles away. For some reason, in my mind there were two choices: walk to the nearby dog park or drive to the further one.

Then at some point it occurred to me that I could *drive* to the nearby dog park, saving my knee, saving gas and time, etc. I could walk longer at the park because I wouldn't have to walk back up the hill to get home. It seemed a little ridiculous to get in the car to drive the short distance to the park, but on the other hand, it helped me a lot. So now, that is what I do. This decision was about giving myself permission to make my life easier, as a disabled person.

Having a diagnosis of RA did help with this act of "giving myself permission." Social support from others also helps. Sometimes people at the DP (dog park) ask if I live in the neighborhood, etc, and I will say in a self-deprecating way, "Oh yes, I should probably walk here, but it just makes it easier to drive, what with my knee," etc. And nice comments from friends and acquaintances in support do help. There is a nice parking lot there and plenty of other people drive.

Other places this applies in my life: Doing just one load of laundry instead of all of the laundry. Using the clothes dryer instead of hanging clothes on the line (except that the driers don't work very well!) Doing a few dishes instead of all the dishes. Breaking tasks up into small bits over time. Some tips on UnF*ck Your Habitat have helped because that site emphasizes small, manageable tasks, with built-in breaks: 20/10s are 20 minutes of cleaning then a 10 minute break. Also they recommend concentrating on a particular area of cleaning, one that you really notice when you are finished.
sasha_feather: Retro-style poster of skier on pluto.   (Default)
Winter Nomads
French? with English subtitles. Seen at WI film festival. (I had a free ticket.)

I loved this film about shepherds who wander the countryside for 4 months to let the herd graze on leftover grass over the winter. It's a "fly on the wall" documentary with no explanations given. Pascal, a man perhaps in his fifties, travels with Carole, a young woman. They have 3 donkeys, four border collies, and about 800 sheep. They travel in beautiful countryside and through towns. They sleep on tarps and skins and eat food over a fire. It's an old way of life in a modern time. It was gorgeous and interesting.

The Sessions

This was a pretty solid movie about Mark O'Brien, a writer with post-polio syndrome, who hires a sex therapist. This film had a great cast and used a lot of Mark's words. It showed some of the realities of his life, was funny and as far as I could tell, realistic.

You can read his orginal essay in the Sun here.

What I disliked about the movie was its uncritical heteronormativity. That is to say; PIV intercourse was presented as being very important, even necessary!, to sex. Kink was not discussed. Adaptive devices weren't discussed in any real way.

Still I recommend this movie because there aren't that many films about disability and sex. And the cast is quite good.
sasha_feather: Retro-style poster of skier on pluto.   (Default)
Leigh Ann Hildebrand: I explain radical hospitality to my classmates by referencing the experience of arriving at a table where all the seats are already taken. Even if you've been invited to the meeting/dinner/event, if you arrive and there is no place to sit, there's a momentary experience of not-belonging. That feeling happens *before* people get a chance to offer a chair or move down or make room, and if there are additional factors like being already marginalized, being the only POC, the only woman, the only PWD -- that first impression can cast a long shadow on the organization. So I tell people, "Always have an empty chair. And if someone arrives to fill it, get ANOTHER empty chair. Make sure that there is always room at your table -- literally and metaphorically -- for the unexpected guest as well as the expected ones."
sasha_feather: Retro-style poster of skier on pluto.   (Default)
Fastening One Heart to Every Falling Thing (51519 words) by thefourthvine
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Hockey RPF
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Sidney Crosby/Evgeni Malkin, Evgeni Malkin/Alexander Ovechkin
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Soulbond, Trope Subversion/Inversion, Spacetoaster
Summary:

Geno can't. Sidney won't.



This isn't my fandom and I know nothing about hockey. That said, I loved this story a lot. It's a great tale about neuro-diversity, and a wonderful subversion of the soul bonding trope.

The world of the fic is one where everyone is psychic to a degree, and everyone soul bonds with their mate. People are warned as teens to be careful about soul bonding too early through touch and sex. Geno is born without the ability to soul bond, thus is able to have casual sex. He's seen as a resource for this purpose; but this of course also leaves him lonely.

Sidney is born super-psychic and isn't taught to control his abilities. He is sensitive, doesn't like to touch, and adamantly does not want to soul bond, despite the nearly universal expectation that he should.

Sidney is told explicitly that he's not broken, but in fact he's significantly impaired by his abilities and must make accommodations daily. He resists therapy, and indeed his therapist is annoying, but therapy is ultimately what he needs. Geno is told that he is broken, but to my eye his problem is all social stigma: people assume that he can't have a partner, and therefore doesn't want one. He's internalized the stigma to a certain degree.

These two men play hockey on the same team and end up being really good for each other.

This fic is really brilliant and I highly recommend it!

Profile

sasha_feather: Retro-style poster of skier on pluto.   (Default)
sasha_feather

August 2014

S M T W T F S
      12
3 456789
101112 13141516
17181920212223
24 252627 282930
31      

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Sep. 2nd, 2014 06:49 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios