A problematic trope
Jun. 16th, 2015 10:22 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sasha_featherI tried to watch the film "RED" the other day but turned it off just a few minutes in. The protagonist Frank, played by Bruce Willis, is shown to be a super-capable ex-CIA agent. He has a flirtatious relationship with Sarah, whom he talks to on the phone, played by Mary-Louise Parker, and he makes vague plans to meet her in Kansas City. Killers invade Frank's home one night, and he has no problem deftly dispatching them.
Next we see Sarah leaving a date behind and entering her apartment. Frank appears in her apartment-- he's been waiting for her, unannounced. She yells at him and tells him to get out, while he tries to calm her down and explain the circumstances. People are trying to kill him, you see, and kill her too, because they've been listening on the phone. This does not reassure her.
Next we see Frank driving in his car and monologuing. With my heart sinking, I knew what came next: the camera panned to the back seat, where Sarah sat with duct tape over her mouth and her hands tied. She yelled through the tape in protest. Frank monologues about his hopes for their relationship moving forward or some bullshit. This seemed to be played for laughs, or at least in a lighthearted way, as Frank asked what food she wanted and she said "Pizza" through the tape. This film was billed as an action/comedy.
At this point, I turned the movie off and watched something else.
This trope is sadly common. Although not always as extreme as this example, many story lines expect and forgive such bad behavior from men towards their romantic interests. Men seem to be expected to violate boundaries and bodily autonomy, and women seem expected to forgive such behavior.
In "Labor Day", starring Josh Brolin and Kate Winslet, the entire premise of the romance is that Frank (again Frank!), an ex-convict, forces a young mother and her son to give him a ride. But oh, it turns out he's not so bad! Just desperate! Despite the fact that he held you at gun point or whatever. (nb I've only seen the preview for this film.)
Does anyone know if this trope has a name? It is super gross and annoying. It is hard enough having boundaries in life and saying no, and telling people to buzz off, etc, without stories like these which present positive portrayals of abusive situations.
Contrast to Mad Max:
When Max and Furiosa meet, they fight for their lives. Max wins the fight, and briefly steals the war rig. He wants to be in control and in possession of all the guns. At first glance, this seemed to me to be a repeat of the above trope, but there was a difference: Furiosa may briefly lose the fight, but she is more in control of her faculties. She is planning and thinking much further ahead. She has allies and knows how to get more: she uses negotiation and de-escalation to gain Max's trust. In the above situations, the men must try to gain the women's trust because they have the power. Furiosa sees Max as a wounded animal and she quite deftly gains the upper hand.
Then too, this is not a romance and it never tries to be. They are both fighters and so it is in some way appropriate that Max and Furiosa meet physically fighting each other. I like the separation here: this is an action movie, not a romance. It is so simply amazing and refreshing to see Max and Furiosa treated as equal fighters, as people.
comments welcome
Next we see Sarah leaving a date behind and entering her apartment. Frank appears in her apartment-- he's been waiting for her, unannounced. She yells at him and tells him to get out, while he tries to calm her down and explain the circumstances. People are trying to kill him, you see, and kill her too, because they've been listening on the phone. This does not reassure her.
Next we see Frank driving in his car and monologuing. With my heart sinking, I knew what came next: the camera panned to the back seat, where Sarah sat with duct tape over her mouth and her hands tied. She yelled through the tape in protest. Frank monologues about his hopes for their relationship moving forward or some bullshit. This seemed to be played for laughs, or at least in a lighthearted way, as Frank asked what food she wanted and she said "Pizza" through the tape. This film was billed as an action/comedy.
At this point, I turned the movie off and watched something else.
This trope is sadly common. Although not always as extreme as this example, many story lines expect and forgive such bad behavior from men towards their romantic interests. Men seem to be expected to violate boundaries and bodily autonomy, and women seem expected to forgive such behavior.
In "Labor Day", starring Josh Brolin and Kate Winslet, the entire premise of the romance is that Frank (again Frank!), an ex-convict, forces a young mother and her son to give him a ride. But oh, it turns out he's not so bad! Just desperate! Despite the fact that he held you at gun point or whatever. (nb I've only seen the preview for this film.)
Does anyone know if this trope has a name? It is super gross and annoying. It is hard enough having boundaries in life and saying no, and telling people to buzz off, etc, without stories like these which present positive portrayals of abusive situations.
Contrast to Mad Max:
When Max and Furiosa meet, they fight for their lives. Max wins the fight, and briefly steals the war rig. He wants to be in control and in possession of all the guns. At first glance, this seemed to me to be a repeat of the above trope, but there was a difference: Furiosa may briefly lose the fight, but she is more in control of her faculties. She is planning and thinking much further ahead. She has allies and knows how to get more: she uses negotiation and de-escalation to gain Max's trust. In the above situations, the men must try to gain the women's trust because they have the power. Furiosa sees Max as a wounded animal and she quite deftly gains the upper hand.
Then too, this is not a romance and it never tries to be. They are both fighters and so it is in some way appropriate that Max and Furiosa meet physically fighting each other. I like the separation here: this is an action movie, not a romance. It is so simply amazing and refreshing to see Max and Furiosa treated as equal fighters, as people.
comments welcome
