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Facilitator: Mary Anne Mohanraj AND Tanya DePass
This was a very good discussion. Some of the incidents outlined briefly at the beginning: Racefail '09; the Open Source Boob Project; that time when Harlan Ellison grabbed Connie Willis' breast in front of a huge audience; and MoonFail. Briefly mentioned later: Jim Butcher has been accused of whitewashing the Hyde Park neighborhood in Chicago; a list of YA books onJezebel Bitch magazine where some books were asked to be removed. Mary Anne talked about an incident involving Heather Ross, a crafter. She also talked about an incident involving herself on a "fail" panel two years ago at WisCon, when she was called on something and apologized. She said that her first instinct as a "nice Asian" is to want to smooth things over, and have calm, reasoned debate. She had to be taught the tone argument, had to learn that being upset can be very productive and that sometimes the upset may need to be escalated. During RaceFail she posted to John Scalzi's blog, posts that got over 1000 comments, which were heavily moderated. How would you handle such a situation? She pointed to other resources, including Jay Smooth's brilliant video on how to react when being called on racism.
We talked about trust and relationships and how we should talk about what is wrong because we care. There is a family aspect to WisCon and many of us have social capital there. We hope to "fail better next time."
I wrote down "safer, contentious, and learning spaces" but I am not sure what that means.
It is good to couch criticism in praise, but we all know that sometimes tone does not matter at all, and the person will feel yelled at.
"We're all swimming in a sea of racism, some of it will stick to you." --Nalo Hopkinson.
Try using a mediator: If you can't talk to the person who is failing, maybe someone else can.
I brought up the concept of forgiveness, or one might say acceptance. I don't want to hold grudges, and I want to forgive people even if they don't apologize, because I don't want to be a bitter and angry person. We can accept that sometimes people aren't going to get it, or it may take them years. (Not at all surprising, that I wanted to talk about emotional work!)
Mia said that sometimes ability and age get left behind in these discussions of social justice and in representations in SF/F.
What if you are the first one to notice something wrong?
How do you balance community needs vs. individual needs? Public vs. Private?
It would be great to model disagreements. Have people who know and trust each other a lot, yet who disagree strongly, be on a panel. Model this behavior for people who have not seen it!
This was a very good discussion. Some of the incidents outlined briefly at the beginning: Racefail '09; the Open Source Boob Project; that time when Harlan Ellison grabbed Connie Willis' breast in front of a huge audience; and MoonFail. Briefly mentioned later: Jim Butcher has been accused of whitewashing the Hyde Park neighborhood in Chicago; a list of YA books on
We talked about trust and relationships and how we should talk about what is wrong because we care. There is a family aspect to WisCon and many of us have social capital there. We hope to "fail better next time."
I wrote down "safer, contentious, and learning spaces" but I am not sure what that means.
It is good to couch criticism in praise, but we all know that sometimes tone does not matter at all, and the person will feel yelled at.
"We're all swimming in a sea of racism, some of it will stick to you." --Nalo Hopkinson.
Try using a mediator: If you can't talk to the person who is failing, maybe someone else can.
I brought up the concept of forgiveness, or one might say acceptance. I don't want to hold grudges, and I want to forgive people even if they don't apologize, because I don't want to be a bitter and angry person. We can accept that sometimes people aren't going to get it, or it may take them years. (Not at all surprising, that I wanted to talk about emotional work!)
Mia said that sometimes ability and age get left behind in these discussions of social justice and in representations in SF/F.
What if you are the first one to notice something wrong?
How do you balance community needs vs. individual needs? Public vs. Private?
It would be great to model disagreements. Have people who know and trust each other a lot, yet who disagree strongly, be on a panel. Model this behavior for people who have not seen it!
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